In my book, "Twist of Fate", there are several themes going on. One of them is fate vs destiny. Several followers commented on this, and shared their stories of fate or destiny. Is there a difference? To help with this, I'm reprinting what I wrote about it, and you decide. After reading, feel free to post your own comments or stories. I'd love to hear how fate or destiny shaped your life for better or worse.
Fate vs Destiny
My book talks about fate and destiny at times. What’s the difference between the two? Are we at the mercy of our fate, for better or worse?
Although some dictionaries define both as pretty much the same thing, I agree with the distinction explained on Wikipedia:
Traditional usage defines fate as a power or agency that predetermines and orders the course of events. Fate defines events as ordered or "inevitable" and unavoidable.
Destiny is used with regard to the finality of events as they have worked themselves out; and to that same sense of "destination", projected into the future to become the flow of events as they will work themselves out.
By both of these definitions, it seems we don’t have a lot of control or power over what happens to us. And yet I know, I can change my destiny for better or worse, but fate? It seems that sometimes negative things happen no matter how hard you try to avoid them.
It’s been said many times, that fate is like a déjà vu, a feeling that this event or meeting has happened before. I know most of us have probably had that feeling. I’ve had it many times in my life, and each time it happens, I become more aware of the situation and persons involved. It means something, and the goal is to find out what that is. A mystery in itself. Why do I have this feeling for someone I just met? Usually you feel some sort of connection to the person in question, and don’t understand why. Plus you feel you’ve done this dance many times before. This is a fated or even karmic connection.
Destiny can be changed by the choices we make. If we don’t like where we are going in life, we can change it. We make different choices and that affects which way the time line is going to travel. It’s like weaving a tapestry. Now the fabric gets woven in a different direction. You won’t know if it’s the best decision until later on. But the good news is, if you don’t like where you are, you can change it. So destiny, at least to me, gives more power and freedom than fate. Although I think if you changed your life drastically, you might also change your fate. I don’t believe it’s all carved out in stone. The jury is still out on this one.
In my book, if I had made a different choice, I believe my fate and destiny would have changed. And it would have affected other people. Our choices are powerful, whether we know it or not. There are always consequences to every decision we make, for better or worse. Anyone not choosing to make a decision, is still making one, and that affects their destiny.
So do people pay for the negative things they do to others? All the time. My hope is that justice happens in this lifetime. Don’t forget that the pain you cause others, you get to experience once you die. How do I know? I’ve talked to several near death survivors, or read some of their books. And I have personal experience from someone who passed away some time ago. Their suffering is endless. And that’s how it should be, especially for those who consciously hurt others. It’s about accountability, and not blaming the victim. Society seems to have forgotten this important concept.
My advice is to be very careful of your choices. We have to have empathic understanding for other people. Doing something hurtful to win, can cause great suffering to yourself. We have to put ourselves in the other person’s shoes. If we did that, we wouldn’t even think about harming anyone or anything else, including animals. And hopefully we wouldn’t even have wars.